A Grandmother by Any Other Name by Julia Sneden

Julia Sneden: A Grandmother by Any Other Name

Of course there are also names that come from foreign language: from German, Oma; from Spanish, Abuela, or a shortened version like 'buela; from French, Grandmaman or even Meme (pronounced Maymay); from Russian, Babushka or Baba; from Italian, Nona or Nonnie, etc. The Scandanavian countries have probably the most sensible names for grandparents, because in addition to being simple for children to say, they teach the relationship:

     'Farfar' - which translates as : 'father's father'
     'Farmor' - which is 'father's mother'
     'Morfar' - which translates as 'mother's father'
     'Mormor' - which is 'mother's mother'

Then there are the far-out, delightful family names for grandmothers. I remember one of the children I taught, who came dancing in one morning and announced: “Today my Grandpa and Sweetie are coming to visit.” I wondered if “Sweetie” might be a dog, or perhaps a new, young wife or girlfriend, but it turned out that “Sweetie” was what everyone in the family called the grandmother.

I know of grandmothers called Peaches and Tutu and Buddy and Shug (as in sugar) and Ladybelle. When I was a kid, one of my best friends called her grandmother Skippy. Skippy was a delightful little lady who understood my 12-year-old’s passion for Louisa May Alcott, and loaned me her very own copy of Jo’s Boys.

Sometimes grandparents are in denial of the title, if not of the role itself. My husband’s grandfather insisted on being called, simply, Bill. His wife was called Chartie (pronounced Shotty), which was a baby talk reproduction of Charlotte. The bond between grandparents and grandson couldn’t have been stronger, no matter what he called them (or didn’t call them). They adored each other.

Sometimes, the use of a first name can avoid a sticky situation. My own children, for instance, called my stepmother “Eleanor,” as did my brother and I. They didn’t seem to feel that she was any less than a grandmother, but I think that not referring to her as grand-something avoided possible resentment within the family. Eleanor herself didn’t mind being addressed by her first name at all. As she said, “They can call me what they like, as long as they talk to me.”

My older granddaughter calls me Grandma Julia, but the younger one calls me just plain Grandma. We didn’t even try to continue the family tradition by referring to me as Grandjulia. It seemed an arbitrary and unwieldy moniker.

Now that the girls have an infant brother, I will be interested to see whether he follows their lead or comes up with a granny name of his own. Whatever it is, you can be sure that I’ll answer to it with a great leap of joy in my heart. Being a grandmother is about as good as it gets. But then, I thought that being a mother was pretty swell, too. After all, that’s what made being a grandmother possible.

©by Julia Sneden for SeniorWomen.com

Editor's Note: Our grandchildren call me Marmu. I thought that taking Marmee, the name from another Louisa May Alcott classic, Little Women, would be a brilliant choice for our grandchild to use. That turned out to be too close to Mommy and she morphed it into Marmu. Now, you can imagine my reaction upon hearing that my son-in-law now associated that name with the killer whale, Shamu. Sigh.

However, my husband took the name our daughters used for my father, Pop-Pop, as a tribute to his caring ways for granddaughters and his son-in-law. It thrills me every time they use that name. My husband's mother was of Norwegian descent and she was called Farmor, which meant father's mother.

This was one of Julia Sneden's most popular essays, but there were many that endeared her to her audience.

This picture was chosen a week before President George W. Bush passed away; we just so admired the Bushes allowing a picture of themselves not coiffed and formally dressed for the photographer.

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Julia Sneden: A Grandmother by Any Other Name

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