"What are you talking?" she asked. "I've got a ringside seat. Nothing gets by me. I’ve seen every show my granddaughters put on. And, you can tell them for me, I'd prefer a little more decent language. I see my great grandchildren. In fact, I keep an eye on them when your girls turn their backs. If I see something important, I give Faith and Jill a knock in the head that makes them turn around."
"Wow, thanks, Mom! So, I don’t have to worry about them every minute of the day?"
"I’ve got you covered," she said. She laughed; the iPad shook. It was great to see her happy.
"So, listen Mom, I called to wish you a Happy Birthday — 65, 102, whatever ..."
"Shush,” she said. "102, never. That's for very, very, old people."
"Oh yes, I remember your telling me you would never want to grow old. Couldn’t stand seeing people in walkers, shrinking, wrinkles. You said it wasn't for you. And when you did, um, die at 68, you had none of those infirmities. You went out gorgeous as ever."
I continued. "Before I hang up, I need to know what you'd like as a present. It'll be virtual, but I want it to be something you’d enjoy."
"Hmm, I'm thinking," she said. She closed her eyes, put her manicured fingernail to her red lips, and continued with "hmm."
"I've got it," she said. "An Apple gift card. Steve gave me a tip that the iPhone6 is coming out soon, and I can use it for that."
"Steve? Jobs? You're friends with him?" I asked.
"I’ve still got the looks," she said. She was offended again. But then she waved a hand to dismiss my question. "Steve's impressed I know the lingo."
"OK, Mom, no problem. In a few minutes look in your iCloud, and the gift card will be there," I said. "Happy Birthday! Love you!"
"Love you, too!" she said. Then our screens went dark.
©2014 Elaine Soloway for SeniorWomen.com
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