Frédéric Bazille, Réunion de famille, between  1867 and 1868;  Museum d'Orsay, Paris, France©photo musée d'Orsay

There are a host of freighted words in our wonderful language. They include so many connotations in addition to simple denotations that they almost demand dissertations.

Think about reunion. Nowadays when the fashion is to press children into adult molds earlier and earlier in their lives,  I've heard of kindergarten reunions. My own children were invited to eighth-grade ones, and it goes on from there. I went to my own 40th high school reunion and my 50th college one. It was that one that made me swear off that kind of gathering.

The first problem is that we know (if we're honest about it) that we're in for surprises both pleasant and not so much. It seems these gatherings force an automatic exercise in comparisons. Every attendee has to face unstated competition as intense as that for college acceptance;  it's just based on different criteria. How have I aged in appearance compared with my classmates? Can I match the average for marriage, number of children, implied income, social status, renown?  

Read more: http://www.seniorwomen.com/news/index.php/a-scrim-of-memory-a-meditation-on-reunions