by Rose Madeline Mula

 Her Honor, Judge Judith Scheindlin, Her Honor Mentoring                                              

When I drove to work on the Massachusetts Turnpike one day in the late ‘70s, I had a life-changing experience.  As I slowed to a crawl to hand the toll booth attendant my money, I did a double-take and slammed on my brake, screeching to a stop.  The hand reaching for my quarter was decorated with nail polish and was attached to a decidedly feminine body with a face to match. I couldn’t believe it! This was historic!  Toll collectors, like corporate CEOs back then, were always men.  No exceptions.  “Oh, my God!” I gasped.  “You’re a girl!” (Yes, that’s what we were called.)

“I’ve been getting that all morning,” she laughed, waving me through.  

When I got to work, all the offices were deserted. Their usual occupants were clustered around the communal coffee pot instead, buzzing about the girl toll collector.  There hadn’t been so much excitement since the day four of us executive assistants (fancy title for secretaries, in lieu of the high salaries we deserved) first wore pantsuits to work — another precedent-shattering event which required more courage than you can imagine unless you lived in that era.  Since none of us was brave enough to walk into the office alone in such unconventional attire, we met in the parking lot and made an entrance together.

I know, I know. This sounds like an episode from a Victorian drama, but such a bold move really was revolutionary for the times. In fact, we created a seismic stir that disrupted work in the entire company for the day as word spread and people from all departments drifted in to witness the phenomenon.

So many other barriers have toppled since then.  

In the mid-‘90s, during a New York visit with a Broadway stage manager friend and family, I got to go to an opening night and cast party! It was great!  But it wasn’t the highlight of the weekend. That occurred the following morning when I went to Sunday Mass and couldn’t believe my eyes — serving the priest was an altar girl!  A first!

What’s next, I wondered. Women Catholic priests? A quarter of a century later I’m still waiting.

But, then, we never anticipated that stewardesses would become “flight attendants,” many of whom would be men — or that so many other occupations would lose their gender-specific identities. For example, the last several years have seen a remarkable mushrooming in the number of policewomen, female physicians and dentists, bartenders, computer engineers, financial gurus, scientists, mathematicians, stand-up comics, lawyers, and judges. (That’s right. Judge Judy isn’t the only one — to say nothing of Supreme Court Justices Ginsburg and Sotomayor). Meanwhile, Alexa, Siri, Cortana, and Ms. Google Home continue to dominate the electronic voice market. 

Conversely, more househusbands and Mr. Moms are keeping the home fires burning, and nannies are no longer exclusively female, as “mannies” join their ranks.  Ditto elementary school teachers and nurses. Yep, we women now must be subjected to the embarrassment that used to be inflicted exclusively on men — having someone of the opposite gender attend to our intimate needs when we are hospitalized.  I know it makes me, for one, think twice about whether or not I really need that bedpan or can hold it until the next shift change when hopefully a female nurse will be on duty (even though I know I sometimes can barely hold it until I unlock my front door when coming home from a shopping trip).  

It’s interesting to note that in some areas, however, men are managing to withstand female infiltration. Doormen are still doormen, for example.  I know that I, for one, have yet to see a door woman. Also, since Joan Rivers’ failed foray into the arena, late-night TV hosts are still male. Since Oprah’s retirement, Ellen DeGeneres still rules the afternoon; but will we ever see a Stephanie Colbert or Jenny Kimmel after dark? Females, on the other hand, unfortunately seem to have a lock on less prestigious, less lucrative careers. Hotel chambermaids, for example, do not seem to be in any danger of being replaced by chambermisters.  Fortunately, advances in technology have eliminated many low-paying jobs that had been exclusively female, including telephone operators, who were always women. I would have dropped the phone if a male voice had greeted me with “Number, please” when I lifted the receiver to make a call.

I wonder what further changes the future holds.  Meanwhile, I’m very glad that women are making progress in the hallowed halls of government, with more and more of us being elected as governors, senators, and representatives. But I won’t be really happy until I see one in the Oval Office!

©2018 Rose Madeline Mula for SeniorWomen.com

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